Will I Love My Second Child? Your Expanding Heart


When I was pregnant with my second child one of my great concerns was how was I going to love another child as much as I loved my first-born son. I was so smitten with my son. We were so bonded. We both got excited when we saw each other. We had such good times together. How was I going to love another with the intensity that I loved my boy?

During one of my many conversations with my mother I shared with her my concern. She was the mother of three children. I was her youngest child. I never thought that she loved us more or less than the other though she did have different relationships with each of us. My mother diffused my fear by telling me not to worry. She said, “Your heart is like a balloon with no limit to its expansion. All you have to do is open your heart and you will love.” She then told me how she is able to love and love and love. She said that with every new member of the family her heart expands to include one more.

My mother was right. My heart did expand. I bonded with my daughter as I had with my son. My daughter became a part of our circle of love.

My mother passed away this past July. She lived long enough to love her children’s three spouses, six grandchildren (including their spouses), five great grandchildren, as well as over 35 nieces and nephews. One of her last acts while she was alive was to hug and fill stuffed Koala bears with her love so that her great grandchildren, who may not grow to remember her, will always have a bear filled with their Bubbie’s love.


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